International Mail

Halong Bay, Vietnam

I sent a letter to Vietnam today. Their 16-year old son will flying 20+ hours in August to live with us for 10-months. What do you say to the parents that have entrusted their care to you? I don't know what it feels like to be in their shoes. I know what I would want to know as a parent. One day, maybe our children will want to go away to see the world. I hope so. My parents know the feeling. When I was 21 years old, I took at teaching job in the People's Republic of China. I was gone a whole school year. I went to undergrad to be a missionary. I think I love this job of placing exchange students in host homes so much because I am using my degree. I get to prepare students for culture shock. Not only do I know about it, I have experienced it. Classes like Cultural Anthropology and the Religions of the World seem more relevant. I have enjoyed being the Academic Coordinator so much this past year, that I wanted to experience being a host parent too. 

So this is what I said: 

"Greetings from America! I have been wanting to write you for a while. As the parents of Phong, we wanted to assure you that we will provide a safe and caring home for your son. We do not know what it is like to send a child to another country for 10 months to live with someone we have never met. We can imagine it would be a difficult decision, but understand that studying in America would look impressive on Phong’s academic resume and benefit his dream of owning an international company someday.

Joseph and I wanted an Asian boy who would be studious and well-behaved to come live with our family. We are both reserved and somewhat quiet adults, who like to relax in the evenings. After looking at a few profiles, we selected Phong. He seems happy and involved in school activities. It appears he likes time alone to reflect and read too. Because we live right next door to the high school, it will be convenient for him to walk to and from school and participate in swimming and clubs, if he desires. There is a swimming pool at the high school. There are many teenagers in our neighborhood who walk to school too. We can take him to get a bike if he would like to ride to school. If he chooses to sign-up for school activities we will support him and keep you informed of his progress along the way. We will take him to get haircuts, buy clothes, get cash from the bank, and to our holiday celebrations. We will make sure his needs are met as if he were our own boy. He will be loved.

We have been telling our 2 & 3 year old children about him and they are excited to meet Phong too! I hope he won’t mind the noise and distraction caused by two young children. They have a lot of energy and enjoy socializing. They go to school all day to learn how to play with others and basic preschool skills, like colors, shapes, numbers, letters, writing, coloring, and vocabulary.

I know you want Phong to gain independence and self-confidence while he is living and studying in America. We will help him achieve that. I think he will return a mature young man. We will give him rules to follow and chores to complete around the house. We will make sure he eats and sleeps to stay healthy. We want him to know he can talk to us if something concerns him. We would like to talk to you through Skype (or Line) before Phong flies over to make you feel more comfortable with the process and us. We are 11 hours behind your time in Vietnam. Maybe we can talk one weekend when Phong is on holiday.

Skype account: *************

Hope this letter finds your family well.

The Hayes Family-Joseph, Rebekah, Lincoln, and Grey"